Posts Tagged friends
Confessions of a ManTaker
Dear Deviant,
Last week I was hanging with my BFF. Things were cool, but I told her I had to go take care of my mom who had a cold. Instead, I went on a date with her boyfriend. I feel terrible about lying, but they haven’t even been together that long. This was our 6th date. We haven’t had sex yet but he’s tried and now I want to. What should I do?
MANTAKER
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Dear MANTAKER,
I will spare you all the moral indignation everyone else would so rightly pour upon you. Instead, let’s forget everyone else’s feelings and just focus on you (something with which you are obviously quite comfortable). If you are going on dates with this guy, I take it you may be interested in more than some hot sex on a platter. This is not a good choice in a mate for you, mostly because he has adulterous tendencies AND a soon to be ex-girlfriend who already has your phone number and address. I take it you are severely starved for attention because of all the guys out there, you chose your “BFF’s” man. You might as well sleep with him- If not to compound the hurt your friend will live when she soon finds out that her guy has been double dipping in the friend sauce, at least because the aftermath will surely lead to another great post on Dear Deviant. PLEASE make sure to use a condom when making use of the community manhoe, no need to sprinkle chlamydia on the stab wounds in your BFF’s back.
DeviantE-mail your love & advice questions to me@deardeviant.com
My Friend’s Friend is not being Friendly
Posted by Deviant in Advice, Uncategorized on June 29, 2009
Dear Deviant,
I have a friend that I started hanging out with and her best friend got jealous. Eventually I just stopped being nice and started reciprocating her behavior. One day the best friend got really immature and told her that she did not want to be friends anymore. So I wrote her and told her what an immature b*tch she was being and that no one was trying to steal her best friend. I really called her out on her behavior towards her best friend and towards me. She apologized and made up with our friend. So what’s the problem you ask? She is still being a B!tch. Not as hostile but her demeanor is still the same. It feels like she does not want me around. I am not backing down over something so immature. After the incident I started being my nice normal self again, but she is still acting cold; a little warmer, but still cold. Should I call her out again in person this time? Should I keep ignoring it and bring someone else around so that I have I have someone to make make me feel more comfortable when in the situation? Lately, if we are in a social setting and I feel her pulling for attention of our friend I usually go work the room. What do you think Deviant?
Annoyed ‘Friend’
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Annoyed ‘Friend,’
That was annoying. This evil friend-of-friend was acting immature, so you went off on her…..in an e-mail.
Where is your mutual friend during all of this cold behavior? Is she too cool to notice this bickering beef of bffs? Or does she realize that if she interjects, it is possible that all 3 of you will have to stand in the corner during recess and then go straight to nap time?
It feels like she does not want you around because she does not want you around. If your new friend (her best friend) does not care to act as a buffer between her two friends, perhaps she is not so friendly either. PLEASE do not bring someone else into this vicious triangle of Real Scenesters of Miami.
Play nice kiddies.
DeviantE-mail your love & advice questions to me@deardeviant.com
Buddy Lovin’ pt. 2
Dear Deviant:
How do you make clear to a guy that you do NOT want to be his sex buddy or his girlfriend without hurting his feelings yet still stay pals? Should I relate a gross or embarrassing story? Leave a turd spinning in my toilet bowl when he hangs out at my apartment?
-ODD
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ODD,
Why you would allow someone to put you out of your zone to the extent of not flushing your toilet is in a word: sad. In other words: bizarre, creepy, masochism, etc. Put your foot down. If feelings are hurt, that’s the way it is. Do you want such a trite friend anyway? Try saying this: “Dig Fam, let me be all the way 100: Somos amigos, you are not getting my panty-draws.” If that approach is a tad too brolic for you, notice of restraining order should communicate the same message effectively. While it will impede your budding friendship, from your description of the situation, court ordered distances were in the near future anyway.
DeviantE-mail your love & advice questions to me@deardeviant.com
Buddy Lovin’ pt. 1
Dear Deviant,
Lately I’ve been confounded by my relationships/friendships with a few guys. Then I realize that these questions are not uncommon, and I’m sick of thinking about them, so maybe you could answer them for me…?
So, Deviant:
1. What are the rules for sex buddies? Is there anything hard and fast I should know, or are the terms and conditions between each pair of friends as unique as the people initiating the relationship? Is there anything I’m missing? How difficult is it to find a man of character to do some shots with and screw not more than once per week? Is that an unreasonable request?
love,
ODD
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ODD,
There are plenty of rules for f*ck buddies, all of which a) you can find on the Internet and b) plainly spell out that there is no buddy in FB-ship, rather said person is more of an unpaid prostitute. If you’re writing me, it seems as though you are missing a lot (unless you sent this from your blackberry while in the sheets betwixt an FB intermission). The only thing hard and fast should be…that’s too easy (and only fast upon request, not fast because your FB’s 1-minute-o’-love is over). What are you really seeking? Requesting a man of “character” to screw you once a week is a completely unreasonable request. If you do not wish to delve into the roller-coaster world of a relationship AND only need it once a week, might I suggest an investment in a pet rabbit?
DeviantE-mail your love & advice questions to me@deardeviant.com